Musings

First, I must give credit where credit is due. I asked my Twitter friends what they thought I should write about. Instantaneously, @darleenw, @j2_whittington & @corpwriter4hire mentioned different aspects of politics as it meets Social Media. So, this is what I came up with for you guys especially 🙂

A few days ago, my family was discussing the political realm as it exists today, and we all agreed that it gets worse every election cycle. More and more 3rd parties are getting involved in ad development. More personal attacks that have nothing to do with politics are being made. Neither side is more or less guilty than the other.  Things have happened over the last couple of years that seem hard to believe. Slapping, yelling, spitting, cursing – all by people who want to lead our country out of these hard times.

The Bad Manners Epidemic

The more I think about manners and etiquette, the more I see that common courtesy in general seems to be pretty lacking. Our leaders just highlight and underline this deficiency. It stuns me how many people will cut in front of another car, at a pedestrian cross-walk, to get to a parking space first. People almost never turn their brights off when they are right behind you or coming at you. Patience in banks and at stores seems to be at a low ebb.

With all of this going on, is it a surprise that many people don’t have good manners when it comes to Social Media?

If these are symptoms, what is our ailment?

I think a lot of people are trying to approach the cyber-bullying problem by trying to write up new legislation and regulations, but I don’t think that’s going to do the trick. I think we need to figure out where the shadow in the real world comes from first.

Why is it so easy for so many people to be rude? Why can we no longer argue with civility? Why are our leaders spitting on each other and telling each other that they are bad human beings? Maybe it’s about fear. Maybe there’s a greater sense of desperation than we are really accounting for. Maybe people need to feel important and powerful as their savings wastes away.

In a way, Social Media is like a screen capture, ever evolving, of what society is like right now. Right now, the big news in Social Media, along with Justin Bieber, is that people are dying because they are being abused on sites that are supposed to be used for Social Networking. What does that say about our society at large?

The Real Leader

I will say one thing about the current state of politics here in the US. I can’t think of a single person right now whom I feel comfortable with as a leader. Why? All of our leaders and leader wannabes are stooping to disgraceful acts of bullying. Is cattiness and bickering really going to put more money in our pockets? Is slamming stuff around and calling each other names really going to prevent anything from getting worse? I don’t see how it is so. I am waiting for the person who says, “Um, hey guys…our educational standards are faltering, our kids are suffering, people are dying from stuff that is preventable. Can we focus on that?” I don’t see anyone singing that song as of now. Maybe I’m missing it.

Rude is as rude does

In the meantime, is it really surprising that cyber-bullying is becoming a huge problem? If you teach kids that it’s okay to drive 75 miles through a residential area, how will they ever know any better? If you teach kids that it’s okay to make racist jokes on Twitter, or to “out” people of different sexual preferences via YouTube, how will they know better? If our nation’s leaders are bullying each other on national television, is it surprising that everyone thinks they have the green light to bully people online?

Maybe the first step towards ending cyber-bullying is to follow the advice given so aptly by the cult classic Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure. “Be good to each other.” (and party on, dudes!). I nominate all of our political party participants to set that new example.

Somehow, I don’t think Election Day 2010 will bring that revolution. Stay tuned.

When I was in college, I had a friend who would come into rooms where I and other people would be sitting. He would look around, pause a moment, and say, “Is there anyone interesting around?”

I have had flashbacks of that routine this week, though it’s a bit different this time around. A lot of people are going to the big Blog World Expo. By “a lot of people,” I mean most of the big heads, most of my Twitter stream, and perhaps, most of the world. I am okay with this.

What’s interesting is that more than 1 person has said, on various sites, “Man, I’m not sure there’s a point in posting right now since all of the “cool kids” are at Blog World.” Or, alternatively, “Oh, now that all of the cool people are at Blog World, I can get to know lesser-known people.”

Huh?

It’s kind of funny. I’m reading a lot of posts about how egomaniacal some of the big hitters are in Social Media. “Oh, they like, totally think they should get paid for their work, and then they like, get mad when I flame their blog posts.” Well, while these are, I’m sure, grievous concerns, are we not perhaps feeding the fire? Are we not ringing Pavlov’s bell and saying, “Hey influencers, be your egotistical worst?”

If you are on Twitter because you are hoping to get retweeted by a bunch of big names all in five minutes, then I’m not really sure you’re quite “getting” what Social Media could really offer you. Now, understand, I’m not saying that the “cool kids” who might or might not be at BWE aren’t deserving of being called cool. There are some awfully cool cats in that crowd. But, I mean, a lot of them have hundreds of thousands of followers and followees. If you are dedicating all of your time and energy to getting on their A+ list, I can’t imagine you’re having much fun.

So, since I’m being pigeon-holed (with the use of very large and broad brush strokes) as a little orphan Annie when it comes to the Social Media world, let me tell you what I enjoy whether or not the “cool kids” are around (you can feel sorry for me at any moment).

1. I love meeting people who are just starting on their Social Media journey. Over the last week, for example, I have gotten to know @gagasgarden. She’s great because she wants to learn, and in trying to help her out, it also makes me realize that once you do Twitter for awhile, there can be a lot that you take for granted. I think that’s really important when it comes to Social Media growth.

2. I love talking to the many new friends I’ve met on Twitter. It’s not a day unless I get a hi from Maya and Suzanne, some funny quip from Cristian, and many waves hello from great people like @myagenda, @RockinRobynC, @DWesterberg, and many others.

3. I love learning from people who are carving out their own niche in this crazy world. Folks like Stan and Lisa Petrilli and Tristan Bishop are always showing me new ways to look at things, new ways to approach obstacles in business and in Social Media. I think it’s great to be driving down the freeway and get to wave at other people who are going in the same direction but in different cars.

Man, what a poor, deprived person I am.

Talking to successful people who have a lot of power in this space is great, and obviously they have a lot to teach newcomers like me. But I would just like to put out there that Social Media can be extraordinarily rewarding, personally and business-wise, if you actually try to carve out your own network, build your own community, and get to know your own people. Indeed, if you are here for  business and you think you’ll make it big by pitching every single heavy hitter in the industry, you’ve got a world of hurt coming your way. Unless I’m wrong and your idea is outrageously fantastic and mind-blowing.

Well, I could be wrong. I mean, I’m not a “cool kid.” Right? It’s ok. I’m quite happy right where I am.

A few days ago, Liz Strauss posed an interesting, seemingly simple question on Twitter.

Where were you a year ago?

The question immediately kind of stopped me in my tracks. Here’s a look at why.

1 year ago from today:

I did not have a professional Blog

I did not have a professional Facebook account

I did not have a Twitter account

I only used my real name on my personal Facebook site, and that was so friends would know who in the heck I was

Domain names were things I never thought about

I liked Blogger better than WordPress

Time sure seems to fly in this land of Social Media. I can’t believe all that I’ve learned, all the people I’ve met…and that hasn’t even been over a year. That’s been over a few months. It’s really kind of scary.

Where were you a year ago? Take a moment and see if you are moving in the right direction in different facets of your life. A lot can happen in a year, it seems.

Image by ramzi hashisho. http://www.sxc.hu/profile/bigevil600

A few days ago, I was cruising Twitter and a fairly well-known person posed a question. It was open-ended and not directed at anyone in particular. I gave the question some thought (I can’t remember what it was now) and tweeted out an answer. I got no response. Well, that’s alright. That happens, still, probably about 75-80% of the time.

A little later in the day, I saw a tweet by the same person. “If you ask an open-ended question on Twitter, it’s a good idea to engage with the people who answer.”

“What am I?” I thought to myself, as I am wont to do. “Chopped livah?”

The issue has been rolling around in my head quite a bit ever since. It has made me kind of look at how people act on Social Media sites. And I wonder if we all practice what we preach.

You’ve got the biggest stage ever for as long as you want it

See, the thing about Social Media is that you can literally blast people with information all day about whatever you want. I’ve noticed that when I talk to people on the phone now, they’ll often say, “Are you there,” when I am quiet and listening. In real life, we’re not used to someone just being quiet and listening. But ah, on Social Media sites, it’s just you and your trusty fingers typing away. If you’ve always wanted to explain to people why tarantulas make great pets, you can go ahead and do that now. If you want to tweet every day about how candy actually is really good for you – go ahead!

The weird thing about this phenomenon is that it brings out the teacher in a lot of people. Teacher or preacher or maybe some combination of the two. There are lots of people who go out there and tweet best practices, advice, counsel, and you can almost sense their index finger wagging at you. If someone like that starts getting positive reinforcement, well, that’s like becoming principal! You are all powerful! You’ve won the race!

Do as I say, not as I do

Because it’s really easy to preach out tips, I think it’s really easy to fall into the trap of spitting out information without thinking about what it really means. This has a lot of potential ramifications. If you are always tweeting out best practices and then you break them the other half of your time online, you might look kind of silly. Even more interesting is the idea that if you gain a fair number of followers or fans or what have you, people might just start emulating you rather than listening particularly to your words. I’ve seen people out there who will retweet anything certain folks say. It’s uncanny. How many times have you been on Twitter, checked the retweets tab, and seen that 100+ people retweeted something like, “Ah, today the sky is above the ground.”

Here are some things that I “preach” that I worry about practicing well. Maybe you have some of these too.

Thanking people for tweets, retweets, listings, etc – great idea, gets hard to keep up with sometimes

Engaging with your community – if I’m rushed or if I need to get some info out, I may not live up to this

Throwing everything you can into what you do – Sometimes I know that I’m not giving my best effort. I get tired.

Neither a mute nor a flagellator be

I’m not saying that you should avoid tweeting out best practices or good ideas. I’m also not saying that you need to be or can be perfect all of the time. Social Media is 24/7. It’s demanding if you do it right. It’s hard to always feel the pressure of providing value. How do you know what everyone considers valuable, anyway?

I’m just saying that if there is a major disconnect between what you say and what you actually do, you could create some bad feelings without realizing it. Here are some things I might avoid saying if I were you.

I answer every comment on every post, so please leave a comment (if someone leaves a comment and you don’t respond to it, that person might feel kind of shafted)

I always follow back: I never have made that promise. If you’re a spam bot, you can get your feelings hurt. But there are people who I just don’t want to follow. I’m ready to be proven wrong if they prove to be more than what I see at first glance, but I’m never going to promise to follow everyone who follows me. I promise.

I will always thank people for following me: This is a great idea, but if you get bombarded after a chat, for example, it just takes too much time, especially if you’re also filtering out people you don’t want to follow. Again, if you say, “I always thank people” and then there’s a person you don’t thank, how will that person feel?

Looking to the future

I am seeing how maintaining a community in the world of Social Media could easily become a full-time job. I take that responsibility very seriously, but that doesn’t mean that I’m going to deprive myself of sleep, meals, or my actual real-life job. There may come a time when I won’t be able to respond back to everyone who responds to me. I will try my best to keep in touch with everyone I’m in touch with now. I will try my best to make every chat that I’ve committed to. But you know what? I can’t promise those things. So I’m just not going to.

Take a moment and look at your Social Media output. Are you talking a good talk but not walking it as well as you could? Does the balance need to shift a little? Even in Social Media, actions can speak louder than words.

Image by Harrison Keely. http://www.sxc.hu/profile/harrykeely