Musings

Hi there!

I am going to be taking a few days off of blogging. A neck injury from about 3 years ago has ended up with me having muscle spasms and 2-3 pinched nerves in my right arm.

Did I mention I’m right-handed? 🙂

Typing kind of is hard to do right now, so I’m going to take a few days away and hopefully that, plus some physical therapy, will get me back into the blogging game.

Thanks!

My friend Tom Moradpour invited me to participate in a new blog community called #usblogs, an offshoot of #usguys on Twitter. The topic for this weekend is 21st century leadership.

I wanted to write a post about how I think of leadership in the 21st century, but then I got to thinking about a person who, to me, embodies the traits I would most want to see in a leader of this century.

I couldn’t really think of any one person.

So then I asked myself, “How do you define a leader?”

I came up with these 50 traits – I’m sure you could add plenty yourself.

1. A leader is willing to sacrifice themselves, not just others. Frederick Douglass once said that John Brown was a far more passionate proponent for abolition. Douglass lived for the slave. Brown died for the slave.

2. A leader is in touch with those he or she is leading and can therefore anticipate what will be needed next.

3. A leader brings positivity, like sunshine, to a room. It’s more than charisma – it’s charisma backed by a confidence that things will get better.

4. A leader does not acknowledge enemies, but rather accepts that some people are challenges.

5. A leader knows when to step back and strengthen him or herself.

6. A leader knows how to prioritize.

7. A leader is organized so that organization can be handed off to others.

8. A leader shows bravery, which means sometimes admitting to being a little scared.

9. A leader is always accessible.

10. A leader never forgets what it was to be led.

11. A leader accepts blame more than recognition.

12. A leader knows who the strongest links in the chain are, and it’s seldom the leader him or herself.

13. A leader is color-blind, blind to gender, blind to ethnicity, but respectful of all.

14. A leader knows when to laugh and when to cry.

15. A leader will sometimes follow if the way is unfamiliar.

16. A leader will create other leaders.

17. A leader sees the trees and the forest, and that little twig sticking up in the corner.

18. A leader has a well of kindness that never runs dry.

19. A leader will pull but never push.

20. A leader will balance criticism with praise.

21. A leader will not compromise those who follow by putting them in an untenable position.

22. A leader will balance when to inform and when to hold back.

23. A leader will not baby the people who follow.

24. A leader knows that no victory resides just with them.

25. A leader is not a leader if there is no one to lead.

26. A leader knows all of the rules and knows when it is necessary to break them.

27. A leader knows how to pay homage to those who went before.

28. A leader knows how to be humble without losing gratitude.

29. A leader’s hair will go grey from worry.

30. A leader’s greatest fear is to lose a comrade, not him or herself.

31. A leader knows how to create relationships within and without.

32. A leader will not stand for in-fighting and knows how to make it stop.

33. A leader knows how to make you follow before you realize you are walking.

34. A leader is a wall that will not crumble, but a wall that affords a vantage point for seeing what is coming.

35. A leader is an ambassador.

36. A leader will give more than receive.

37. A leader will never feel that the task of proving oneself is complete.

38. A leader will never stop learning.

39. A leader will admit that someone has strengths that he or she does not have.

40. A leader is not afraid to learn from the competition.

41. A leader knows when it is time to exit.

42. A leader knows when it is necessary to take charge.

43. A leader does not complain about the burden of leadership.

44. A leader is cognizant that some may be jealous and is respectful of that perception, though it does not defeat him or her.

45. A leader knows you cannot please everyone.

46. A leader does not ask anyone to do something he or she would not do.

47. A leader does not turn up the nose at anyone, regardless of the circumstances.

48. A leader knows that when you point a finger, there are three fingers pointing back at you.

49. A leader earns respect but does not ask for it.

50. A leader will probably not always recognize themselves as leaders.

So those are my 50 traits. I can think of leaders who embody several of these, but not really one person who embodies all. I’d love to hear how you define the 21st century leader, or who you think of as the ideal 21st century leader!

Image by Debbie Wogen. http://www.sxc.hu/profile/dwogen

This wonderful guest post is by Mark Robertson. Have a talk with him on Twitter @markosul. A new friend with some great ideas – thanks for this post, Mark!

When was the last time you were lost in a picture book? Are there certain images, words, storylines—even smells—that seem seared into your memory?

I can remember when my mom read me “Runaway Bunny,” by Margaret Wise Brown. I recall being fully absorbed in the images, and can feel the mother bunny’s fierce, almost supernatural love for her rebellious son. How did Brown know what was written in my three-year old soul? How did he know my mommy was Mother Superior—and the sense immense love and dense loyalty it transmitted?

I didn’t know that “Where the Wild Things Are” was a parable of the primal nature—especially among boys—to enter the “shadow world” of adventure. All I knew that it was gripping, that MAX was MARK and that Sednak articulated my deepest stuff in images and an economy of words.

How did these stories capture my soul, lift me into flights of the imagination, and take me back to a richer homeland, “where the soup is still hot”?

Picture books and blogging

My reflection on the power of storybooks has made me think of ways these “hypnotic powers” can be applied to internet writing. The trifecta of image, word, and organic storytelling transmits deep meaning—simply and clearly. Like good blogging.

Very few children’s writers have the engaging power of Shel Silverstein. I began reading and writing independently, called by Silverstein’s “Invitation”:

If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar, A Hope-er, a Pray-er, a Magic Bean buyer, If you’re a pretender, come sit by my fire …

Silverstein had an appetite for the offbeat. Like me. But his poems and stories were also laced with the kind universal existential folklore that captures the primal joy and anguish that follows love’s absence.

Here are four simple writing lessons I’ve learned (read: am still learning) from Shel:

• Simple line driven words and visuals (let’s not call it minimalism) are attractive because there is less visual information to digest. Create visual images that give only enough information—allow your reader to enjoy co-operation and co-creation. While few blogs are entirely black and white, attractive ones have a simple palette (see the earth tones and grayscale in Jonathon Mead’s Illuminated Mind).
• Flex your love, not your vocabulary. Silverstein has rich understanding of human psychology (the “Giving Tree” is one of the finest examples of Carl Jung’s archetype of the anima), but simplifies BIG IDEAS it into small, elegant stories and poems.
• All space on page or screen is real estate. Like poet William Carlos Williams, Silverstein used white space brilliantly. For example, the text of the poem “Falling Up,” seems to be pushing the child into the clouds. The left page is nearly empty. Lazy Jane drinks water by “waiting for the rain,” and the words fall from the top of the page into her mouth. Like poets, bloggers measure “real estate” in picas and pixels. All space is useful and can add or detract from the message.
• Be fearless. Shel clearly had no qualms with nonsense, hilarity, and moments of transcendence. He tackles issues from laziness (“Lazy Jane”), overeating (“Hungry Mungry”), stupidity (“Smart”), peeing in the garden pots (“Gardener”), experimentation (“Alice”), to unconditional self-sacrificing love (“The Giving Tree”).

Perhaps “everything we need to know [about writing], we learned in kindergarten.” If so, Silverstein, Dr. Seuss, Sednak and the gang are here to remind us.

What are some elements from Silverstein that you see in your writing? Please feel free to help me add to my list of lessons we can learn from children’s literature.

Image by The Horton Group. http://www.sxc.hu/profile/hortongrou

This is a guest post from one of my new friends, Paul Flanigan. Paul is a frequent speaker and blogger, consulting clients on brand marketing through digital and social media. He has managed media networks for retail and professional sports teams for 15 years. You can find Paul writing (and occasionally ranting) at www.experiate.net

It’s February. How are those resolutions working out for you?

You had good intentions. A new year, a new reset. When the clock hit midnight, it was moment of renewal. You could start fresh with so many things: Start that new blog, get that dream job, lose that extra 20 pounds, or find that special someone of your dreams. And while ramping up to tackle that resolution, you filled your head with motivational blogs and sayings, stuff to get you going. Then you put things on a calendar: “I’m going to do this today! And on Wednesday! Then on Friday!”

But there was a hiccup, and before you knew it, your resolution was slipping away. You now have it as a note, something to get back to. It can wait. You can get to it a little later, right?

C’mon.

Perhaps the new year brought you a degree of hubris that clouded your judgement.  Now, after a month, you realize a year is, in fact, a long time, and that your goal is beyond your ability.

Here’s the good news. You still have 11 months to do it. And with a little course correction on your plans, you’ll get there. Here are three methods I have used to recover my resolutions in February and still meet my goal before another ball drops on Times Square:

Go Get A Date
December 31 to January 1 is no different than February 9 to February 10. The stroke on midnight occurs 365 times during a year. Go ahead and pick a different one.

There is a psychological “reset” factor to consider. It would be easy for me to say, “Start on a Monday,” because we so often associate Monday as the start of a new week. Personally, that doesn’t work for me. I prefer to start on a Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday, because it feels less like a planned reset and more spontaneous. Start on a significant number, or your favorite day of the week. There is no law against starting on a Friday. Whatever day you choose, your ingrained positive outlook on the day or date will be a motivator to tackle the resolution.

Break Down Your Goals.
Were they too lofty? Were they too far reaching? Try this:

Instead of one single goal for the year, break it out into six bi-monthly goals, or 11 monthly goals. See the results after 30 days. I caution you from thinking about a goal after one week because the results are too drastic. You could see incredible results after five days, but the results wane after 10. Or you see nothing after five days and give up.

For example, it seems that most people, when starting out a new workout, get about three days into it before they crash due to lack of desire or incredibly sore muscles. If you start on Monday, chances are you won’t be doing it on Thursday or Friday. So why not start on Wednesday? Then you have three days of workouts followed by two days of rest and recuperation. The R and R comes quicker and next Monday’s workout seems less daunting. Psychologically, you feel like you accomplished a whole week of workouts, and this motivates you to continue into the next week.

Be Flexible
Life doesn’t have a schedule. I have yet to do anything that isn’t interrupted. The key is flexibility. You may not be able to get to that project in the morning, or you may not be able to dedicate the time each day promised. But 30 minutes is better than nothing, and when in a situation to produce, it’s remarkable what you can accomplish in a half-hour.

It doesn’t seem so bad when you think about this way, does it? The key to resolutions is knowing there is an end, a resolution.

Your journey can start tomorrow. (Or the day after.)

What other methods would you suggest to recover those resolutions?

Image Credit: http://www.sxc.hu/profile/uwbobio

Fifty years ago this week, a young Catholic man from Boston named John F. Kennedy was inaugurated as President of the United States of America. The day of his inauguration was frigidly cold and blindingly bright, two contrasting conditions that pretty well sum up his presidency, if you think about it. People don’t really remember, though, what the temperature was that day. It’s not even an oft-repeated part of our nation’s folklore that poet extraordinaire Robert Frost couldn’t see the paper on which he had written his poem specifically for this occasion. No, what people remember about JFK’s first and only inauguration day is his plea – “Ask not what your country can do for you,” and his proclamation, “A torch is passed.”

In Social Media, the concept of passing the torch is an integral part of the fabric of this world. I would know very little if people had been unwilling to pass their knowledge on to me. I’d have very little to say if I wasn’t interested in passing on what I’ve learned to others. Are you passing the torch?

How do you pass the torch in Social Media?

You’ve probably heard broad statements during your time in Social Media, statements like, “Give everything away” or “Give to get.” What does that really mean, though? How can you give while still building your business or your brand? How can you pass the torch without giving away the store? More to the point, how do you pass the torch while avoiding the pitfall of simply repackaging what others have said before? Here are some ideas.

• Offer advice as you have lived it: There is a lot of advice flying around in this space, but no one has adjusted quite like you did. Instead of offering buzz words, explain how you got to where you are. What worked? What didn’t?

• Don’t try to be everything to everyone: It’s tempting, when you are finding your place online, to try to be the expert at everything. You want to be the expert on Twitter, then Facebook, then blogging. This ambition can cost you credibility. Bow to others who know more about certain areas. When it comes to Facebook, for example, few people I know exceed Tommy Walker’s knowledge. When it comes to Google Analytics, I can’t think of anyone who offers more expertise than Avinash Kaushik. Don’t pass a torch you don’t have.

• Don’t squirrel away all of your secrets: It’s true that we all have a secret sauce that allows us to succeed as we do. However, there is plenty that you can tell people without offering those precise measurements that make you you. If you found shortcuts or if you found huge traps over your time in this world, let people know. Send out warnings or tips at will.

• Look for ways to help: This doesn’t mean that you always have the answer yourself. Passing the torch can mean that you share your networking or your community with someone. You share your awareness of that person’s expertise.

• Always give the gift of you: The best single way to make sure you aren’t just repackaging someone’s stale advice is to be genuinely, authentically, certifiably you. Nobody is experiencing things exactly as you are. No one has your voice. No one has your personality. When you offer advice or tips or warnings or consultation, make it come from you.

Don’t doubt you have something to offer

JFK was the youngest president elected up to that time – you could say it was pretty audacious of him to announce that he was grasping the torch of his generation.  You might think it’s crazy to think that you have enough knowledge and experience to be able to pass anything on. But you’re wrong.

Not only are there tons of people joining this world who are newer than you, but there are also people who have been here longer who don’t know what your experience is. We just know how it was for us. What trials and tribulations are you experiencing? How are you working around them? This is important, because no one has done exactly what you’re doing before. You have something unique to pass on right from the start.

A challenge

Here’s a challenge for you for this week. Pass the torch on to just 1 person. Whether it’s answering a question, writing a blog post with a person in mind, or cheering someone on who is having a hard time breaking in, pass the torch. Pass on some knowledge. Pass on your perspective. And tell your story here in the comments.

Do we have a deal?

Today, Carol Roth wrote an incredible, blunt, truthful post about the status of women in the world of entrepreneurship, business, and Social Media. It’s called At the Business Table, Where Are the Ladies? One of the key questions Carol asks is, “Why is there a TED for women?

There was a time in our country when the general philosophy regarding racing relations was summarized by the statement, “Separate but equal.” Of course, the “separate” rang a lot more true than the “equal.” Now, we look back on those times and think, “Man, how could our nation have ever gone there?”

And yet, in so many cases, “separate but equal” still summarizes the situation that exists between men and women.

If your gut instinct is to say, “That’s hogwash,” consider the following:

The WNBA

Women’s collegiate teams versus men’s

Women’s high school teams versus men’s

The LPGA

and, as Carol mentions, TED for women.

This is not the 1940s

I suppose it’s easy to think that all of these female-specific leagues and groups are progress. After all, when we watch a movie like A League of Their Own, we see how happy women were to have their own baseball league.

There’s just a couple of little problems with this line of thinking. First, that story takes place in the 1940s, during World War II. And second, the only reason THAT league formed was because the men were off fighting the Fascists, which took a higher priority (thank goodness).

We’re into a whole new century now, not to mention several decades away from those times. Isn’t it time we move beyond a league of our own?

Women and Social Media

There are so many amazing, strong, genius women online right now that it’s truly hard to mention just a few. In addition to Carol, my days are filled with the intelligence and leadership epitomized by women like Liz Strauss, Lisa Petrilli, Amber Naslund, Marsha Collier, Ann Handley, Beth Harte, Mari Smith, Denise Wakeman, Jill Manty, Debra Leitl, Kristi Hines, and tons more. And yet, as Carol points out, if you ask who the “big names” are in Social Media, it’s mostly men who will be mentioned. Guy Kawasaki, Chris Brogan, Jay Baer, Brian Solis. The women seem kind of pushed over to the side. There are lists that focus exclusively on women, but seldom are women equally applauded with men. Seldom are women rewarded with the same respect and pull.

Why?

Maybe we need to make it happen

Maybe women aren’t getting the same kind of respect because we aren’t demanding it. I would say that it’s hard for a woman to aggressively demand respect. It is so easy in our society to call such women bad names or to attribute their ambition to “that time of the month.” But maybe we just need to keep enduring the insults. Maybe we just need to change the conversation. Maybe we need to say “no thanks” to a group slotted out for “us types.” Mix us in, please.

What do you think?

Are we stuck in a 1940s mentality, where a “league” or “group” created for women is thought to be equality? Is something else afoot?

Let’s continue the conversation.