Marjorie Clayman’s Writing Portfolio

Professional writing profile of Marjorie Clayman

Margie Clayman

How a mantra from Good Will Hunting can change your life

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Humans seem naturally wired to ask a single question all of the time: “Is it me?” When we go through a hard time, we automatically start searching for what we did to deserve it. When someone passes away, we think, “Is this because I didn’t sweep off their porch in 1987?” When someone treats us poorly, we think, “Gosh, what did I do to that person?”

To quote Sean from Good Will Hunting, played by Robin Williams, “It’s NOT your fault.”

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Why Avatar should have been called The Social Network

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Do you ever feel like you are forever behind in movies? Granted, you’re always behind because of all of the movies made before your time – I only recently watched Breakfast at Tiffany’s, for example. However, every year, when the Oscars come and go, I always tell myself, “Man, next year I’m going to see more movies so that I can, well, care.” It doesn’t work. Case in point – I just watched Avatar last night. And uh, well…I still haven’t seen The Social Network. I know, my family thinks this is ridiculous of me too.

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Five blogging lessons from the Coen brothers

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Do you have a list of people whom you are fairly certain would turn you into a puddle of mush if you ever met them? C’mon, be honest now.

Well, I have a LONG list, which is one of the reasons I don’t venture anywhere near Los Angeles. Being in the same building as Johnny Depp, for example, would probably cause me to spontaneously combust. It might interest you to hear that I am pretty sure that the same end result would occur were I ever to meet the Coen brothers.

A lot of things have been going through my mind about blogging lately, and I realized that a lot of the answers resided in just thinking about the Coen brothers a bit, which I am always happy to do. With that, here are some insights into blogging that you can gain by studying Ethan and Joel Coen.

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Sisterhood of the traveling pant suits

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My friend Lisa Petrilli tweeted out an article from the Wall Street Journal today. It’s called Women Lag Further in Reaching Executive Ranks. The article reports that there are actually fewer women working as CEOs than there were a couple of years ago even though women are ahead of men educationally. Women are also earning less money. In the social world, women tend to have fewer Twitter followers and less pull in the business niche, by the way.

As these things roll around in your head, consider the blog post written earlier this week (I refuse to send traffic its way) that noted that to be a truly successful PR professional, women need to know when to “show a little bra strap.” The male counterpart? Touch an elbow.

Hmm.

So what’s going on here, folks?

Divide and Conquer

Let me put this hypothesis out there for you.

Whereas men in the business world have set role models and rules of etiquette (or lack thereof) to follow, women are not a cohesive sisterhood when it comes to the same issues. As my friend Daria (@mominmanagement) so aptly showed through her “executive image” series, women can’t even agree on how best to dress for success in the business world.

There are other divisions out there, too. For example:

• Some of the most prominent women in the business world who work online tend to use a lot of swear words in their blog posts and tweets. Have you noticed that? Whereas other women stray as far away from vulgar language as possible. Why? To both modes of behavior.

• Some women define themselves first as mothers, then as business women. Other women turn that order around.

• Some women go out of their way to network with other women. Some women go out of their way to network with men. Still other women try to network with everybody equally.

• Some women argue that the glass ceiling is broken. Other women argue that the ceiling is made of granite.

And of course, then there is the ultimate division that men may not realize goes on in the world of women. There are some women who believe that the woman’s ultimate and best place is at home as a mother. Other women believe that the best place for a woman is in the professional, cut-throat world. And other women try to do it all at the same time.

Women are certainly divided. Are we on our way to being conquered?

Not a League, but Maybe a Team

Not too long ago, I wrote a post saying that I didn’t think stashing women away into a league of our own is the answer. I still believe that. However, maybe women do need to start thinking in more of a team mentality. Maybe women need to depend on each other more to build each other up. Maybe women need to actively support each other. This isn’t to say that women can no longer compete against each other, but if you look at successful men in the online business world, they tend to have support networks. If one man tweets out a post, you can usually bank on certain other men retweeting that post.

Does the same dynamic exist on the female side of the fence? I don’t see it as readily.

Is there something that can be done about that?

Are women so anxious to compete against men that we are all stomping on top of each other to get to the “big leagues?” Are we being sexist ourselves?

What do you think?

image by Muriel Miralles de Sawicki. http://www.sxc.hu/profile/murielle

Coins or Content?

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Film critic David Edelstein made some pretty interesting comments about the Oscars this year. Most interesting was that Edelstein said that he knew Natalie Portman would win the Oscar. What Edelstein basically insinuated is that Portman, like Christian Bale and many other actors and actresses, are starting to act, seemingly, specifically so they can win the Oscar. Throughout Black Swan, for example, Edelstein says that you never forget that you are watching Natalie Portman act. You never forget how much weight she lost for the part. You never disappear into the story. In other words, Edeslstein is hypothesizing that actors are acting for the rewards, not because they find acting rewarding.

The Blog Rewards Program

It’s easy to fall into a similar trap in the blogosphere. You start out thinking, “Good grief, if I could just get 1 comment on a post telling me that what I’m saying is worthwhile, I’d be happy.” The gift of sharing your thoughts is enough to make you smile. But eventually, you start noticing that really powerful blog posts get the blogger certain things. You maybe get noticed by a really influential person. Maybe you get asked to write a book. Maybe you get retweeted so much that Twitter breaks. Suddenly, blogging as a craft, as an opportunity, doesn’t mean as much.

Are you blogging for rewards instead of for the love of it?

Have you noticed any of the following patterns developing?

• You think of a topic that would be helpful to your readers, but you don’t feel it’ll get a lot of attention, so you opt not to write it

• You scrap a lot of posts you write because you don’t feel like they’ll get retweeted much

• You write about topics you don’t know a whole lot about because they’re getting a lot of attention

• You get depressed about a post if it doesn’t get a whole lot of attention, even if the comments that you get are great

If these thought processes are running through your mind, you are paradoxically headed for less success, not more.

Rewards are not the answer

Just like acting, really good blogging hides the muppet strings, if you will. Readers will forget that you are in this competitive marketplace, that you are trying to do this that and the other thing. They just know that you are a good, reliable resource who gives them information that helps make THEM better.

If you start blogging to get more attention or whatever else you consider a potential reward, you will be dismayed at the results you’ll start to see. Here is a small taste of what can happen in this scenario.

• Your readers will quickly realize that they are no longer your priority

• Your readers will also realize that as a resource, your information is playing second fiddle to tools that get you noticed

• You will never be content (and that’s only a partially intended play on words). A post that does well will just make you want to write a post that does better.

• Positive feedback from your community will diminish in meaning as you become more hungry for your rewards

• You’ll put so much pressure on yourself that blogging will no longer be rewarding on any level and you’ll burn out

There is just one reward to shoot for

As a blogger, you have a job. That is to be a valuable resource for your community, and even for the community at large. If people are asking you questions about a topic and they are expecting you to write about it, you have an obligation to do so, even if you know that the topic is not the kind of thing that gets a lot of attention.

Here’s something that will really mess with your head. The more you blog for your community, the more rewards you will collect, and the less you will care about those random achievements. When it’s about your community, their happiness, their comments about how helpful you are, are all you need.

Which way do you want to go?

So what will it be? Will you, like our modern actors today, put aside your art and blatantly shoot for the gold statue? Or will you keep the spotlight on the community of people who read your blog and who depend on you for good, solid information? Which path are you on right now?

Let’s talk about it.

Image by Claudio Jule. http://www.sxc.hu/profile/kwod