The Best Gift You Can Give

Posted on November 14, 2011

You know how when you’re a little kid, the dark corners of your room can seem really scary? Those spots under your bed, that shadow the door leaves on your floor, that little nook in the wall near your closet – they all seem like great places for monsters and bogey men. After a lot of sleepless nights, your mom and dad probably caved in and got you a tiny little night light. Now, most nightlights are pretty darned small and the light they generate is not really overwhelmingly life-altering, but somehow, it’s enough. We feel like our concerns have been addressed, we feel like someone cares, and hey, that little nightlight does lighten up those super dark spots a little bit. At least it gets easier to tell that there aren’t monsters hiding in your room, right?

When a person is going through a really hard time, their every day existence can seem like that dark room from your childhood. Every corner seems to have another new obstacle to face. Every shadow seems to be an omen of more bad things ahead. Efforts may be made to open the blinds to let any light in, but the moon isn’t out and it’s pitch black everywhere. It seems for this person like there is no way things can get any lighter, and the people who keep reminding them that morning is just around the corner just don’t seem to get it.

When you see a friend or a loved one going through times like these, there is one little thing you can do that can be more powerful than any “Chicken Soup for the Soul” book.

You can give them that nightlight otherwise known as hope.

Hope is kind of an overused word and it sounds a lot more glamorous, perhaps, than it really is sometimes. Just like nightlights, sometimes hope can be delivered in the tiniest of packages, and you may not think it’s enough to make any kind of difference. But there is the actual hope you are giving someone and then there is the fact that you stopped to help. That makes the light shine brighter.

Hope can come in all kinds of forms. For children who are living on the streets who may not have hope for a better future, hope can be a new home, help with school, and a good breakfast. For a person being bullied all of the time, hope can arrive in the form of a kind and caring word. For a person with economic problems or health problems, new solutions, or even the possibility of new solutions, can be how hope shows itself.

Hope may not be enough to solve a person’s problems. It might not even be enough to make them feel better for very long. But hope has a way, just like a nightlight, of evening out those extra dark spots so you don’t have to spend energy worrying about those lurking monsters. Offering a person a little light when they are surrounded by the deepest darkest night can be a little reminder that people are out there pulling for them.

Have you gone out of your way to offer someone who seemed to be without hope a little boost? Have you spent some time thinking about ways a person could attack his or her problems? Have you considered one small thing we could do to help someone feel a little lighter and a little more loved? It’s free, and in fact it’s priceless. But oh the value your time and energy will carry for that person grasping in the dark and cowering from monsters.

It’s worth a shot, isn’t it?

Image by Christie Thomas. http://www.sxc.hu/profile/cnw

7 comments

  • JPlovesCOTTON says:

    Margie! I LOVE THIS! Its so true and the kind of reminder we can all use. Shining a small light seems inconsequential at times but when you are in absolute darkness, that tiny bit of light is incredibly brilliant!

    I’d add to it by saying a sincere thank you can truly brighten a person’s day too. It can be the light. I did a really simple gift to say thank you the other day but later found out how much it meant to her as a couple of hours later she was still saying how much it meant. It made both of us feel so much better that I wanted to keep giving!

    Thanks for all you do!

  • PointA_PointB says:

    This is so lovely, Margie! I actively try to look for people who are having a hard time and help them. I try to find people who have lost their sparkle and re-launch them.

  • suegrimm says:

    That’s it. That’s exactly it. Thank you for holding out the light. I needed it and maybe others too!

    When I finally decided to write on my blog over the weekend, which had only one post so far, I shared about the Penn State tragedy,, I chose not to focus on the darkness, I chose to focus on the vigil that was held on Friday night where thousands of people held out a light to the victims. Maybe only the few I asked to read it will ever see it. That was my only intent and why I’m not linking to it. Most important, I wrote it for me. But Margie, your blog has helped me and maybe others too.

    And maybe a light you held out helped someone you don’t even realize is seeing it too. They may never thank you, you may never know, but you may have helped someone who needed that light at that moment in time. And when you share about things that smell bad or offer simple advice about social media, if it feels right to you, that’s really all that matters in the end. I understand SEO. I understand linkbait. And I understand the sketchy rules. Yes, it’s a difficult balance how we use our abilities and when we use our abilities. It’s something I struggled with before I decided to blog. There’s nothing wrong with seeking attention, or building your tribe to boost your business or career. That’s part of what this is all about for many of us. But those who are genuine, and real, ultimately do stand out. And that’s why I commented here. I’m not ready to move forward yet, as I try to come to terms with what’s happened and decide my next steps. But I too saw someone I wanted to hold out a light to and that person was you. Do what feels right to you whatever that is from day to day and week to week. That’s all any of us can do. That’s how we help each other. And that’s how I see this working and that’s pretty amazing isn’t it?

    • margieclayman says:

      @suegrimm Wow Sue. This is the kind of comment that keeps me coming back.

      I’m so sorry that you are having to struggle on such a personal level with this Penn State tragedy. It is the nadir of human existence on so many levels, and the emphasis seems to be on all of the wrong things.

      Were lights held out for the victims? Maybe not at the time, but is late better than never? I’d like to think so, certainly.

      Hang in there. I’ll always keep the light on for ya 🙂

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