• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Margie ClaymanMargie Clayman

Marietta, OH

  • About Me
  • Marketing
  • Librarianship
  • Random Musings
  • Contact Me

Don’t tell me what I can and can’t do

February 10, 2011 by Margie Clayman 15 Comments

As we head towards the Spring “new show” season on television, I am lamenting the fact that I no longer have Lost around. Sure, there was a lot about the show that bugged the heck out of me. For example, why did we spent 2.5 seasons getting really deep into a character only to have him completely disappear for the last half of the show? That’s a mystery that the riveting conclusion did not even attempt to answer. Still, it was a fun show to complain about, a fun show to hypothesize about, and I got to be pretty good friends (or so it seemed) with the characters.

One of the characters from Lost has been on my mind lately. His name was John Locke (there was another character who went by Rousseau – my friends and I had a great time trying to figure out how the presence of two great philosophers would play out in the overall story line) and his catch phrase, if you will, was “Don’t tell me what I can and can’t do.”

In Social Media, this should be your mantra.

You’re an island in an archipelago

People tend to emphasize the word “social” in the phrase Social Media, but the reality is that in terms of executing your plans, building your brand, and achieving success, you’re on your own. You can talk to the other islands around you, but when push comes to shove, it’s just you who’s out for you.

This can be really, really easy to forget or overlook. After all, there are all kinds of people offering you advice. There are people who you think of as really powerful and successful, and they’ve all got a story about how they got there. It seems so easy to follow their path, stepping in the footprints that they left. It can be really easy to feel kind of intimidated if you think maybe you want to take a step off to the right.

Don’t let people tell you what you can and can’t do.

It worked for me. It might not work for you.

Social Media lends itself to thinking that you can paint by numbers. For example, when I was having massive problems getting anything but crickets to pass over my blog posts, I asked some people I respected what on earth I could do about it.

“Ask questions!” One person said. So I started ending all of my blog posts with a question mark. Nobody answered.

“Comment on another person’s blog regularly,” another person told me. I did that. And nothing changed.

What you find out is that you have to dig out your own strategy. You have to customize everything you do to your personality, your objectives, your readers, and your community. These pieces of advice I got worked well for the people that were trying to help me, but they didn’t work for me. They may or may not work for you.

Don’t ask what you can and can’t do

The sky and the ground are your limits in Social Media. There aren’t even agreements on best practices. One person’s spam is another person’s marketing campaign. Don’t be afraid to gather information or to ask for advice, but always look at it through the prism of that person’s experience. Don’t believe that anyone has all of the answers for you other than you. Don’t believe that what you are doing is “wrong” just because someone else thinks it’s silly. What matters is if what you’re doing works for you and what you’re trying to do.

Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Unless you want them to.

Filed Under: Marketing Talk

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Mark says

    February 10, 2011 at 8:08 pm

    Thanks, again, MC! I used to be worried about being found a fraud; then I found the non-fraud was just fine enough.

    Compelling metaphor re:archipelagos. Recalls Jung’s collective unconscious…we ARE connected, but it is very hard to navigate the deep mountains that connect us. We can only send firework-flares to the other peaks above water.

    Thank you for the Lockean refrain.

    Reply
    • Margie Clayman says

      February 11, 2011 at 12:01 pm

      Thanks, Mark. It’s always nice to be able to use the word archipelago. This was my big chance! 🙂

      Reply
  2. Kenny Rose says

    February 10, 2011 at 8:46 pm

    Margie,

    Advice is critical and so is support. We all want to be loved. In the end. You have to make the best decision for you. Everyone wants to give the impression their a social media expert or they have the answers. Some say don’t show any weakness, Some say don’t come on too strong. Some say join my tribe. Others, join no tribe. In the end everybody is different and has their unique angle. You just have to believe in yourself and find yours.

    Reply
    • Margie Clayman says

      February 11, 2011 at 12:01 pm

      Exactly right, Kenny. Well said. You have to balance your desire to please others with the need to make sure you are okay with yourself.

      Reply
  3. Paul Flanigan says

    February 10, 2011 at 10:48 pm

    I agree with Kenny.

    It’s tough. You want validation that you’re doing the right thing. Comments is way to know. Looking out for yourself is easy to overlook, and it’s really scary.

    I’m about to do a couple of things that scare me because I’m sure I’m going to lose a few people that I was certain were close to me, people I thought I could count on. Only in my head have I realized that once I get through a couple of major obstacles, I’ll be able to really refine who I am in this culture of social media.

    You’re absolutely right about the questions and comments. I’m not adding a comment because I think it will do much for me. If that was the case, I would just put comments all over tarnation. Instead, I’m doing this for you, because I like my dialogue with you. That means I don’t put my comments everywhere.

    Here’s the thing: At the end of the day, the only person I want to be happy with is me. Am I? If so, then I have built a sustainable (and hopefully growing) island. If not, then things need to change.

    Reply
    • Margie Clayman says

      February 11, 2011 at 12:02 pm

      Sorry to hear you are entering some scary waters, Paul, but I do appreciate your contributions to this blog – you always enrich the experience for me, and I’m sure for the other folks who swing by as well.

      If I can be of any assistance, just let me know!

      Reply
  4. Rufus Dogg says

    February 11, 2011 at 8:39 am

    Brilliant stuff! One of the things that people who venture out onto social media discover (too late maybe) is when it come time to execute anything or rely on the “social” part of social media, “you’re on your own, you have no friends.” (Quoted from a favorite show of mine.. since you got to do ‘Lost’)

    Seriously, though, everyone has a best way of doing this, everyone will tell you you’re right, you’re wrong, do this, don’t do this but at the end of the day, it is YOUR time, YOUR money that is on the line for execution. If it goes well (e.g. Chris Brogan) EVERYONE will want to be your friend. If it fails… *crickets*

    Most ventures worth doing are not me-too so why apply a me-too social media strategy? I’m busy working one now where a lot of the conventional wisdom of the SoMe crowd simply does not apply so I;m making stuff up as I go.. so far, the client is buying it.. more as I near the launch.

    Anyone want to be my friend now? Later will be too late. 🙂

    Reply
    • Margie Clayman says

      February 11, 2011 at 12:04 pm

      Haha, so true though. It’s easy in this space to think that people are going to follow what you say word for word. It’s easy to ask each other for advice and support. But in the end, you have to do so knowing that you won’t be swayed from what you feel is the best path. It’s a delicate dance that I’m not sure a lot of people are ready for. It has come as a surprise to me, that’s for sure 🙂

      Reply
  5. naomi timperley says

    February 11, 2011 at 12:47 pm

    i think guidance and support is good – one thing works for one person but might not for another.

    Reply
    • Margie Clayman says

      February 11, 2011 at 9:16 pm

      Absolutely. Guidance is extremely important – I’d even say necessary. But that’s a very different animal from “Do this my way or you’re dumb.” I think some people may forget that – on both sides of the issue 🙂

      Reply
  6. Mike Miller says

    February 11, 2011 at 2:10 pm

    02/11/2011 – Hi Margie – Once again good writing on your part! Yes the lack of restraints & borders draws me to the web. We want to use our “Freedoms” to the MAX. The Net/Web remains the “New Frontier.

    We are to some extent envolved in a Gold Rush. Like the Gold Rushers of 1849 we are establishing our own rules, norms and Societies { Mining Camp Councils}. We want to avoid Government requlation {we don’t want the Web to become the 51st State in the Union}.

    A History Lesson = Most of the $ made during & after the 849 Gold Rush was made by the folks selling gold pans & shovels {Stanford, Comstock, Wells & Fargo}. Few Minors made any $, However they had the experience of a life time.

    The “Real $” being made today is flowing the direction of Google, Face Book, Apple, Microsoft and a few others. We bloggers & small business’s will not make much monetary profit however we enjoying one of the best experiences of our life times.

    Cordially

    Mike

    Reply
    • Margie Clayman says

      February 11, 2011 at 9:17 pm

      Great analogy, Mike. I love the stories of those people who picked up everything, moved to the area where the Gold Rush was happening, and opened up little stores and diners. They made an absolute killing!

      Thanks for feeding my history geekdom 🙂 You rock!

      Reply
  7. Kyle says

    February 11, 2011 at 2:45 pm

    Thanks Margie! Love the words of wisdom…you go GirL!

    Reply
    • Margie Clayman says

      February 11, 2011 at 9:17 pm

      Thanks, friend!

      Reply

Trackbacks

  1. Tweets that mention Don’t tell me what I can and can’t do | Margie's Library of Marketing Musings and Morsels -- Topsy.com says:
    February 10, 2011 at 8:32 pm

    […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Barbara Winter, Mark Robertson and Vickie Young, Marjorie Clayman. Marjorie Clayman said: Don't tell me what I can and can't do. http://bit.ly/i9wOb5 […]

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Previous Post: « The Now Revolution: Listening and Responding
Next Post: Amber Naslund and Jay Baer to visit TweetDiner! »

Primary Sidebar

Recent Posts

  • Seeing Double: African American Literature
  • Book Review: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow
  • Book Review: Land of Lincoln, by Andrew Ferguson
  • The portrayal of the infertile woman in entertainment
  • Chapter 3: A Weird Thing Happened Today

Recent Comments

  • Delores Baskerville on Are you locking out blog subscribers?
  • frank c tripoli on Book Review: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow
  • Lyv on #30Thursday number 10 (we’re in the double digits?!?)
  • Fitoru on New Recipes, 2013
  • Anna Wyatt on Help me petition to deactivate driver-side airbags for Little People

Archives

  • February 2021
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • April 2017
  • October 2016
  • July 2016
  • April 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • December 2014
  • October 2014
  • July 2014
  • June 2014
  • May 2014
  • February 2014
  • December 2013
  • October 2013
  • August 2013
  • June 2013
  • May 2013
  • April 2013
  • March 2013
  • January 2013
  • December 2012
  • November 2012
  • October 2012
  • September 2012
  • August 2012
  • July 2012
  • June 2012
  • May 2012
  • April 2012
  • March 2012
  • February 2012
  • January 2012
  • December 2011
  • November 2011
  • October 2011
  • September 2011
  • August 2011
  • July 2011
  • June 2011
  • May 2011
  • April 2011
  • March 2011
  • February 2011
  • January 2011
  • December 2010
  • November 2010
  • October 2010
  • September 2010
  • August 2010
  • July 2010
  • June 2010
  • May 2010
  • April 2010
  • February 2010
  • January 2010
  • December 2009
  • April 2009
  • March 2009
  • February 2009
  • January 2009
  • December 2008
  • November 2008
  • October 2008
  • September 2008
  • August 2008
  • July 2008
  • June 2008
  • May 2008
  • June 2007
  • April 2007

Categories

  • Book Reviews
  • Crafts and Charity
  • Gardening for Renters
  • Marketing Talk
  • Molly Maggie McGuire
  • Musings
  • PassionPlayers
  • Uncategorized

Meta

  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.org

Footer

marjorie.clayman@gmail.com

   

Margie Clayman © 2021