Personal Posts Can Be Prickly
One of the first posts that I read when I really started blogging a lot was a post by a woman who was coming out in the open about the fact that she was being physically abused by her husband. I read it and experienced a myriad of thoughts. First, I thought it was really great that she was airing her family’s dirty laundry so that she could let other people know that they were not alone. Then I saw it being retweeted all over Twitter, and I thought, “Hmm…what if it ends up in the wrong hands because of all of that retweeting?” Then I thought, “I feel kind of weird knowing that much detail about a person I don’t actually know at all.”
The seduction of many comments
The super personal posts in Social Media are kind of like sirens. They sing to you and say, “Ohhh, you’ll get such good traffic from this. So many comments.” And often times, it’s true. The other nice thing about personal posts, and I think why a lot of people write and publish them, is that they take care of that whole “be human” thing you hear so much about online. If you write about a serious illness, the death of a loved one, or some other major life-changing experience, you are showing people a side of you that has nothing to do with your business.
Then again, it has nothing to do with your business
Here’s where it starts to get a bit thorny for me. If you are out here representing a company, whether it’s your company or one you work for, are you fully weighing the possible ramifications of writing that super personal post? This is what I worry about for people new to the blogosphere.
You see, a lot of times, when you write a personal post, you attract readers that may not normally read your stuff. If you are writing about a struggle with Cancer, for example, you may get readers who are suffering through the same fight. If you’re writing about child abuse, you’ll probably get visitors who are touched by that subject in some way. But if your profession does not have to do with those issues, your new visitors will eventually melt away as you get back to business. You won’t keep them around for the long haul.
It likely will not bump your sales.
The other thing I worry about when I read super personal posts sometimes is that you might be revealing things that could come back to bite you. If you write that your health is really bad, is it possible that someone might say, “Well, that doesn’t seem like a sturdy situation right now – I’m going to hold back.” If you write about something super personal that your friends or family or co-workers didn’t know about, will that come back to haunt you?
Be careful
Of course, I don’t think that personal posts are “bad” or “wrong.” I’m just saying that it can be tempting to send one out into the world after you watch the 50th personal post get 500 comments. Make sure you think about it for 24 hours before you hit “publish.” Think about how you would react to it if you didn’t know you – because a lot of people who read it won’t know you. Think about possible ramifications. Weigh those against possible benefits.
Make sense?
image by Darko Skender. http://www.sxc.hu/profile/ime
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Margie, I love your blog exactly because of how the “humanity” in your writing comes through.
I agree it is a tricky thing and I really struggle with it. I try to stick with business topics but with my personal points of view as much as I can (boring). So I don’t get a lot of comments. I write this way to be *helpful* and the few comments I get usually say that I am. Some of the more personal posts I’ve written have caused some backlash, which is fine too I guess. The 24-hour rule is the best advice.
Thanks and keep on sharing!
You raise a good point and an important delineation. There’s personal and then there’s personable. I’m all for being personable. When I say “personal post” I’m talking about the posts that are kind of confessional. “I’ve struggled with this” or “I have this problem.”
It’s a big difference, and I think sometimes people may confuse one with the other.
I doubt anything on your blog is boring 🙂
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Michael Brenner, Marjorie Clayman. Marjorie Clayman said: Personal Posts Can Be Prickly: http://bit.ly/eHOhXD […]
Dear Margie –
Prickley – and dangerous.
There was an article this morning in the Chicago Tribune about a Facebook post.
A woman was on disability at her job and her Facebook page showed her partying and running a marathon.
Guess what happened to her disability insurance. Yep. Gone.
I like to hear some personal things. They make me feel the author is more real.
I like it more if it is a story. Storytelling is fun to read.
But writer beware.
Big Bother is watching you far beyond the book 1984.
Yeah, it’s easy to get comfortable – too comfortable – in the online environment. You get into a mode where you’re talking to your friends. What harm could come from telling them personal stuff? But your friends have friends. They have friends. So on and so on. It’s so easy to lose control of your content. For a business that’s terrific news. For an individual suffering from a serious problem, not so much.
Would you feel weird knowing that much about that woman if she were on staff at a newspaper and her article appeared there? Or if she were the author of an autobiography or an autobiographical novel? I’m guessing no, although in all cases she’s the same woman, and you’ve never met her. Blogs are really no different.
Well, I think there’s a difference between a personal blog and a blog that is tied to a corporate entity. If your blog is really a company blog, I think a personal post would be unexpected. If you are writing for a newspaper and have free reign over what you write (pretty much) I think that would be different.
I always envision that this blog is like me sitting in a conference room with a client. Would I blurt out super personal stuff as we head into a meeting? Not too likely. I use that to guide my behavior.
In the beginning of my career (before social media), my boss told me ,”Don’t put anything in email you wouldn’t want to wake up and see on the front page of the paper.” I’ve used that rule ever since and think it applies here. For example:
Sharing I just got married / had a baby/ etc… personal but perfectly appropriate to share as a positive event.
Neighbor’s cows got loose in my yard (yes it really happened!) I did share because it inspired a whole blog post about raising cash for your biz.
Anything that might fit in on Jersey Shore (which I do NOT watch) is better left unsaid on a biz blog.
That’s a good rule. Some posts I read are definitely in the grey area. On the one hand, like I said, if you are mentioning that you are a Cancer survivor and that’s why your business is doing a big charity event…I can see the tie-in. If I go to a blog I visit often and suddenly the person is doing what a friend of mine calls “bleeding all over the internet” my gut instinct is to cover my eyes and back away slowly.
You’re right thought – it’s not a “this or that” issue, for sure.
Margie,
I believe that I read the post you are writing about. I worried as I read it, thinking what might a court of law, divorce attorney, judge, jury think of the post. I have tried to return to the post, but it can no longer be “found”. I don’t know what that says exactly…except that your advice is direct and should be heeded: Think carefully about the benefits and ramifications.
Judy
Interesting. I remember agreeing with all of the people who said that the post was really brave and courageous, but the whole time I kept thinking about whether her family knew about this, her friends, her boss, her co-workers – and as you said, the legal ramifications of such a post are well over my head. I didn’t retweet the post for that very reason. Not that my retweeting it would have made a major difference, but I just thought, “Yerg.” And you can quote me on that 🙂
Will keep in mind when I hit Publish… But it is something that always keeps me on my toes if I am writing something to personal or if I am voicing my values and beliefs.
I think that extra analysis of making sure you are comfortable before hitting publish is good advice.
It’s always helpful to be aware of the consequences of our choices and our intention for sharing. There are so many variables: what kind of work we do and who we work for, if we’re sharing about another person, etc… It’s a personal decision.
I agree with Nicole – the internet is a big place, front page for a long time. Thanks for sharing and initiating some dialogue around this topic. ~ Karen
[…] Ultra-Personal posts: I wrote awhile back about how personal posts can be prickly. There is a difference between being personable and personal. Yes, writing about really personal […]
[…] talked here before about how personal posts can be prickly. I still recall, a year later, one of the first posts I saw that was getting a lot of attention. It […]
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